Weight Loss Tracker

Monday, December 29, 2008

My husband has another woman

I'm at a total loss. DH has an old childhood friend here from back home. They chatter incessantly about the past, about what they did, what trouble they got into, what trouble they kept out of, what so-and-so is doing these days, and... FOOD.

I have watched and listened as my husband describes, for example, Sweetwater Tavern's bread pudding in seductive, delicious detail: the crisp on all sides of the mini bundt-style breading; the cream and butter that most certainly is used to keep the moist bread together; the perfect way it's heated through so that every bite gives you just a bit of crunch AND sweet stickiness; the bourbon sauce that is so delicately poured over and around this delight; and how the buttery ice cream on top perfectly blends with all the other flavors and textures of this treasure and gives him a sensory overload like (I feel) I have never done for him.

My husband has another woman, and that woman is food. I have seen him describe food dishes the way other men describe the curve of a woman's breast, the swell of her hips, the pulse at her throat, the flash of desire in her eyes. As I draw away from food as a living, breathing organism that is there for the pure enjoyment of it and not as a life-sustaining entity, he is still dancing the dance of love with the bread puddings in life.

What about me? As I listened to him describe this dish to his friend today, I almost blurted out that I doubt he gets as big a rush from making love to me as he does by his oral fixation from food. I swear, I almost did, and I swear, I truly believe this to be the case. It hit me like a ton of bricks right then and there, and I felt jealousy! And had it not been for the fact that it would have been more embarassing to ME than to him to admit that he appears to be more seduced and aroused by food than he ever has been of me, I probably would have said something.

So here I am at 4:00 am, trying to sleep on the couch because Mr. Romantic is snoring his ass off in bed so badly that even my ear plugs won't blot him out, and in the quiet of my living room this all just hit me. So... how does one approach their husband about the other woman and tell him how she feels about this affair when the other woman is food?

I am beginning to feel as if I am not the love of my husband's life. :(


  1. ok, i have to admit i couldnt read the entire description of the bread pudding... **drooool**...

    how do you approach him? tell him to KNOCK OFF THE DESCRIPTIONS ... NOW!!! lol...

    that would drive me crazy too...

    does your DH use breathe right strips? they help a bit but not completely... DH uses them and ever since i've been preggo i've needed them for sinus issues....

    hope you get some rest.

  2. Well, I kinda gave him my crud, so I know that is a big part of it. It's not usually this bad...

    As for the descriptions, it's not even that he's describing yummies. It's HOW he does it... like a woman would wish her lover would describe HER or think about HER. I know it sounds absolutely nuts, but it's like I'm jealous of his desire... for FOOD, for cryin' out loud. :(

    I really do need some rest. Just started a Z-pack and nasal spray, and joy joy, I have my first fill today. I wish I was feeling good enough to be looking forward to it.

  3. OMG Beth! You described the desert so well I think I can taste it! I sure hope it is carb fee imaginary pudding!
    It is so funny that I have also loved food in such a way! It is going to be harder for you since you live with a full blown foodie! My husband has lost quite a bit of weight just because I do not cook or eat very much anymore.
    I agree that you need to get some strips to help with the snoring since holding a pillow over his face would be illegal! lol

  4. "I agree that you need to get some strips to help with the snoring since holding a pillow over his face would be illegal!"

    Omg, CC, too funny! But I hear so long as I don't make him stop breathing to the point of no return, it's... iffy. :D