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Friday, May 22, 2009

Imagine my surprise

I bought some jeans recently on eBay. That has become my "mall of choice" lately because I am going through sizes quicker than Bill goes through interns.

I just got some size 18 Levis in the mail yesterday and, though I thought they may not fit yet, I opened them today. Hubby and I were taking the motorcycles out to run errands and sign the gazillion papers necessary when refinancing your own home (go figger), and I always wear jeans when I ride. I looked at my size 20s on the floor (cuz I'm SUCH a good housekeeper), remembering hubby tease me the other day that I had "baggy butt," but I looked at the 18s and thought, "Nah, probably not yet. They look too small." But that little voice which usually tells me to do dire and dastardly things (like spend money we don't have or call my now ex-boss an "effin' hypocrite" -- wonder why I'm not working there... hmmm...) spoke up and instead gave me some good advice: "Try them on!"

I thought, "Meeh, what the heck. What's the worst that can happen? I get them up but can't button them yet... so I just wait a week or so and then I'll be able to."

So I step into them, one leg at a time, and pull them up. Part of me expected them to come to a screeching halt about mid-thigh, but no, they went up and over the hips. Ah, but surely they won't button, and even if they DO button, there's no way I can zip them up without my apron becoming permanently wedged between the teeth of those metal teeth. But... omg, they DID button, and they DID zip -- AND I could still breathe!!! Imagine getting into jeans that look too small, getting them buttoned and zipped, AND you can breathe!! I would have just been happy with NOT being able to breathe, if only I could get them secured! But I could do BOTH?? My gosh, it was like a multiple orgasm. No, really.

I had to look at my shrinking ass in the mirror before I left, so I went into the bathroom and checked it out. Meeh, I wouldn't wish for an ass like that if I saw it on another chick, but I was damn pleased with what I saw.

I have a pair of 16s coming next, but I won't try those yet. I still like breathing. :)


  1. OMG what a great feeling huh! Nothing like starting to think like a skinny chick. Your blogs are always upbeat and I love reading them, and you always give me a laugh.
    Keep rocking...
    Cara x

  2. Thanks, Cara. I hope I can always be upbeat, but guaranteed there will be those times that I won't be. But I'll still try to be funny. Like my post about saying the word "shit" 832 times in one post back in December. :D

  3. I love reading your blogs, they always crack me up. Way to go on those jeans! That ass is just going to keep getting smaller and smaller too!

  4. Thanks, Susan.

    Hey, so long as the rest of me gets smaller in relation to my ass. I mean, could you imagine? :P

  5. Wow... congrats Beth! That is a great accomplishment. I had a similar experience last week with something in a size 20 that I haven't worn in about 10 years. WHat a great feeling!

  6. WOOT WOOT! That is so awesome when that happens! Its even better when you are have no expectations of them fitting and then they do fit! And fit great! I will have to look at ebay. I havent looked at it in years.

  7. I swear by eBay, Amy, especially since we are going through what I call "transition clothes." The likelihood is that we will only fit in them for a matter of months, so why buy new? :)