Weight Loss Tracker

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Reality sucks

My friend took me to her gym last Thursday to reward us for a 5 mile walk we forced our dogs to take with us. She thought how great it would be to soak in their hot tub and saunas, and I agreed.

After signing in and going through the mandatory sales pitch (which ended abruptly, amazingly enough, when I said I was without a job), we headed to the locker room to change into our suits. Well, I planned ahead and had mine on under my clothes, so all I had to do was disrobe.

What fun. Among all these perky bodies (mostly), here I am. But hey, I'm feeling good cuz I'm down 55 pounds, right? I'm feelin' hot...ish. I mean, clothes have been looking good on me so hey, why not wear a suit (a one piece, of course. It's the law when you're over 200 pounds). And then... I turn and look at about a football-field length of mirrors which are reflecting me in all their glory. WHO THE HELL IS THAT?? Omg, talk about taking the wind right out of your sails! I can only imagine it feels like it does when some frisky guy is about is to get lucky for the first time with a girl and she points and laughs at his teeny erect member. Total deflation.

To add insult to injury, when we went into the sauna, we disrobed down to towels. I was SO HAPPY that my towel wrapped around me and covered all my doo-dads, since I could never do that. Then I remembered -- I didn't just have a towel, I had brought one of those big bath sheets, a towel that could cover a king-sized bed. Second erection killer.

But it's all good. Still, I'm down 55 pounds. That's about the weight of a Smart Car, right?


  1. You are a work in progress and gym/locker room light is not flattering...I find the dimmer the better. Once I got down to about 209 and I wore a bikini. I look at pictures now and think "damn...you were smokin". Too bad I gained like 115 pounds after that and have the stretch marks to prove it!

  2. Haha, if only it was just the lights! It was also the mirrors. Lots and lots of mirrors. And the reality that I still have so far to go, but that's okay. I'm more than 1/3 of the way there. :)

  3. That's right! So suck on that bright lights and mirrors!