It wasn't until I just now read a thread on LBT about jealousy and lost friendships with weightloss that I kinda had a >BOINK< "I coulda had a V-8" moment.
After having visited the friend and gone through all the other stuff I mentioned earlier, it was easy to miss the fact that she really didn't say anything about my weight loss.
Now mind you, when I decided I was going to do this, she was the first one I told. As a matter of fact, I called her on the way to the seminar and said I was pretty sure I was going to end up going this route. Her reaction was a simple, "Hmmmm." It was followed by the typical concerns and questions, but there was no "that's GREAT" moment. Okay, that's fine. I don't expect her to feel like it the way I did, but still.
So I go to visit and no comment like, "Hey, you look good/great/fantastic," nothing. I think I remember her saying something about yeah, I weigh less than I did the last time she saw me, but nothing else.
Then again, SHE is the largest she has ever been. We've known each other since we were 25 (me) and 24 (her), and she has definitely gained a lot of weight. Now maybe I see why she is not seeming to be happy for me.
Even though she is where she is, it's still sad when your best friend doesn't seem happy for you. Or maybe I just expect too much in life. :(
No, I don't think it's expecting too much of life to want your friend to notice how much weight you've lost. Instead of being ticked off and jealous - if that's what she is due to the lack of acknowledgment - she should take stock and say, 'Hey, if Beth can do it.. so can I!' It's really that simple.
ReplyDeleteI see so many stories about marriages, relationships, and friendships ending over weight loss... it just makes me wonder if I will lose it all and be starting over. She and I have been friends for 19 years. I just found it odd that NOTHING was said.
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